It is the season when our hearts are drawn together to experience Christmas, and many of us across this nation gather with family and friends to celebrate the birth of Christ among us. Some traditions start celebrating this eve by attending church and then having a special home cooked meal prepared for them as they await Santa Claus’s arrival for the children and young at heart. Others celebrate the Festival of Lights or the Winter Solaces. As we each celebrate, something stirs deep within us that I call an awakening of the Spirit that often creates a new season of hope in our lives.

Our traditions have been passed down from our family or religions. We can find solace in knowing, that there in lies a deep mystical truth for each of us to rediscover from one generation to another.

This Christmas, like many other people around the world, I will be celebrating the holiday season without someone I love. Many of our loved ones have passed into the Glorious Light of Heaven. It can be a very raw and painful experience. Personally, I am helped through this process by warm memories of Christmas past, a time of pure love and joy in my life. Sometimes I would trade anything for one more embrace, one special word, a glance or kiss. When the holiday songs begin to play I can’t help but recall childhood memories of family gatherings with grandparents, aunts, uncles or cousins who helped create more beautiful memories of my life time.

Merry Christmas from Celebrating Life Ministries - by Rev Paul Funfsinn

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to All!

Like Rev Paul Funfsinn and many of you, I too am celebrating this special season of joy and hope with my loved ones… even the loved ones who are in heaven. I miss them terribly; my Mom, Dad, and sweet Hanna. Merry Christmas to you! May you be safe, warm, happy and loved well. Know that you remain in my heart forever and are sorely missed.

Like you, I must live and be happy with my loved ones who share my side. Together we celebrate peace on earth.

Happy Holidays to you!

Carol

To Our Veterans and Active Duty Armed Forces!  My heart of gratitude goes out to you! Thank you!

This U.S. holiday stretches back to the end of World War I and commemorates the nation’s thousands of combat veterans who fought in the service of their country.

Did you know that there are 23.6 million military veterans in the United States as of 2007?

Learn about the experience of veterans after returning home from war.

Veterans Day Holiday

Simple exercises to help you heal that I have done after Mom’s passing and now after Hanna. It’s a letter writing “letting go” process that completed over a period of several days. My personal letter writing to Hanna will extend over a two week period… I’m not ready to let go.. but through this week’s Grief and Loss Series, I am getting there. In the letter writing, the first one is written to the one or situation that you recently lost, then the second is a response to the first letter after several days. When both are written.. put away in a safe place, then both are read in the order they were done.

From the book “Healing Grief ” by James Van Praagh

Letter Writing - The first letter

Prepare your space, have pen, paper & envelope,

Center self & be prepared to work

When ready - start writing your letter to the person or pet who has passed or situation that you lost

Describe exactly how you are feeling and what you want that person/pet/situation to know

Write how the passing of the loved one or the change in the situation has changed your life

Express everything including anger blame you might have repressed

After you’ve completed the letter, review it to make sure that everything is covered.

Now, put it in the envelope, seal it and put it in a safe place

In a couple of days, repeat the exercise but this time instead of writing a letter to someone or about something, write a response to the original letter.  When you are thoroughly finished with the response, put it in an envelope, seal it and place it with the first letter.

Two days later, take out both letters and open them up in the order in which they were written. Notice the difference in your present feelings about your loss. Begin to evaluate your changes. Let to and recharge.

Peace be with you..

Carol

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Here are the books that help me cope with the loss of Hanna. My hope is that these books, or the ones you are guided to select, will bring you peace and wholeness once again.

Saying Goodbye to Your Angel Animals: Finding Comfort after Losing a Pet by Allen and Linda Anderson

For everyone who loves an animal the day eventually arrives when it is necessary to say goodbye. Most people admit this is one of the hardest things they ever have to do. Now where can they turn to for unconditional love? How will they fill the hole in their hearts?

This comforting book is lovingly written by authors who have personally taken the journey through loss and with the thousands of people who write to share stories about their special pets.

Coping with Sorrow on the Loss of Your Pet by Moira Anderson, M.Ed.

Coping with Sorrow on the Loss of Your Pet provides a wealth of compassionate advice and specific coping strategies to help you deal with the loss of a pet. This book calls upon the experiences and suggestions of dozens of pet owners across the U.S. who have dealt with loss.

Ten Tips on Coping with Pet Loss by Moira Anderson Allen, M.Ed. - The following list and site is very helpful to me.  In grieving, we may not think clearly and getting answers to hard questions can be comforting. Please know that we’ve listed a shorter version of the FAQs and highly recommend visiting the site for comprehensive answers to these tough questions (the site is listed below).

1. Am I crazy to hurt so much?
Intense grief over the loss of a pet is normal and natural. Don’t let anyone tell you that it’s silly, crazy, or overly sentimental to grieve!

2. What Can I Expect to Feel?

Different people experience grief in different ways. Besides your sorrow and loss, you may also experience the following emotions: Read them here.

3. What can I do about my feelings?

The most important step you can take is to be honest about your feelings. Don’t deny your pain, or your feelings of anger and guilt. Only by examining and coming to terms with your feelings can you begin to work through them.

4. Who can I talk to?

If your family or friends love pets, they’ll understand what you’re going through. Don’t hide your feelings in a misguided effort to appear strong and calm! Working through your feelings with another person is one of the best ways to put them in perspective and find ways to handle them. Find someone you can talk to about how much the pet meant to you and how much you miss it-someone you feel comfortable crying and grieving with.

5. When is the right time to euthanize a pet?

Your veterinarian is the best judge of your pet’s physical condition; however, you are the best judge of the quality of your pet’s daily life. If a pet has a good appetite, responds to attention, seeks its owner’s company, and participates in play or family life, many owners feel that this is not the time.

6. Should I stay during euthanasia?

Many feel this is the ultimate gesture of love and comfort you can offer your pet. Some feel relief and comfort themselves by staying: They were able to see that their pet passed peacefully and without pain, and that it was truly gone. For many, not witnessing the death (and not seeing the body) makes it more difficult to accept that the pet is really gone.

7. What do I do next?

When a pet dies, you must choose how to handle its remains. Sometimes, in the midst of grief, it may seem easiest to leave the pet at the clinic for disposal. Check with your clinic to find out whether there is a fee for such disposal. Some shelters also accept such remains, though many charge a fee for disposal.

8. What should I tell my children?

You are the best judge of how much information your children can handle about death and the loss of their pet. Don’t underestimate them, however. You may find that, by being honest with them about your pet’s loss, you may be able to address some fears and misperceptions they have about death.

9. Will my other pets grieve?

Pets observe every change in a household, and are bound to notice the absence of a companion. Pets often form strong attachments to one another, and the survivor of such a pair may seem to grieve for its companion. Cats grieve for dogs, and dogs for cats.

10. Should I get a new pet right away?

Generally, the answer is no. One needs time to work through grief and loss before attempting to build a relationship with a new pet. If your emotions are still in turmoil, you may resent a new pet for trying to “take the place” of the old-for what you really want is your old pet back. Children in particular may feel that loving a new pet is “disloyal” to the previous pet.

For complete version of tips and answers, please visit Pet-loss.net.

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